Mama Fortuna
23 December 2011 @ 05:33 pm
Mama Fortuna
22 December 2011 @ 11:48 am
Sooooo. Fuck you too, LJ.

It's been, what? Ten years? Yeah, I think so. But I'm not quite so stupid as to think you're gonna change just for little ol' me. I saw the pictures of the rest of the new shit you want to unroll, and it's not for me, thanks. I already have and hate facebook.

So I'm packing my bags. I'm moving this ranting bullshit to Dreamwidth or Blogger. I'll update with the address as soon as I get settled.
Mama Fortuna
19 December 2011 @ 09:49 am
It is SO FUCKING COLD. This is not making me want to go jogging, world. Although since I mysteriously managed to fuck up my shoulder/neck yesterday to the point that I could only lay in bed for hours moaning to Shawna, perhaps I'll use that as my excuse to be a slug today.

So, had the annual Chickens Christmas party. Brought gin, drank out of ridiculously fancy looking plastic cups that only Shawna and I used because they hold less liquor. Did NOT get pissed, merely slightly drunk. Saw Norm sing "I'm Too Sexy" which was frankly amazing. There was a handmade-secret-santa thing that I participated in - you had to make a gift, and then everyone who did so got to pick another handmade gift. I won some Melody Mangler pasties, which is good because that woman HAND SEWS all of her sequins on them in a magical way that you don't see the thread, but bad in that they're always made for people with small nipples. I have large breasts. My nipples are thankfully proportionate so that I don't look freakish, but it does mean all my pasties get referred to as "little hats!" backstage. I myself made a Burlesque Emergency Kit, and gingerbread cookies. I totally, totally cheated and told the solitary man participating in the gift exchange to pick that box because I was pretty sure he did not want the pasties. Plus he loves my cookies.

I got to chat with some of my favourite people, which included Blue Morris, who recently wrote this fine article on being male in the burlesque world. It's a fine article, and not just because he mentions my loud and mouthy self.

Hey, who wants to see some photos from a while back?!

I do! I do!Collapse )

In other news, New World Witchery has the audio spellbook put together! I have to listen to it, still! :D And yes, I did win a prize. I am all aflutter over this, still.

Last night Shawna and I recorded our second podcast. Due to limits on file size with a free account on podbean, we've had to cut it into two parts. This may change if we decide that yes, we want to do this a lot. For now though, you'll have to suffer. I know you kids with your itunes and ipods and whatever can handle it. The topic we discussed was "attention to detail" and we managed not to go off about cat piss for ten minutes.
Mama Fortuna
11 December 2011 @ 11:05 pm
Stripped, Scared and Sacred. We've just started out with the freebie account, which sadly means we had to cut our rambling into two parts. But yes, those are our shrill voices going on about American Horror Story. (Spoilers spoilers.)
Mama Fortuna
11 December 2011 @ 10:46 am
So, Shawna was cutting our podcast last night, and she looks over at me and says, "...jesus my voice is high."

Yes. Yes it is. So is mine. Maybe we should have called it 'Shrillcast.'

Anyway, we're hoping to get it up and perhaps record another one today. Until that happens, enjoy the description I've written for it:

Stripped, Scared and Sacred – Episode One: “He's all gnarled and burned and like, 'let's fuck!'”

In which our heroines discuss American Horror Story and cat shit.
Mama Fortuna
05 December 2011 @ 09:09 am
So. Today's the first day of my unemployment. My contract expired on Friday, and although the company does want to hire me back next season, that's... next season!

Oh, if anyone wants to see what I've been working on? 1001 Nights airs on Teletoon up here in Canada on December 19th. I forget the time slot - I think it's like, 8 AM and 3 PM or something like that. It's gonna be on CBC too, I think, although that may just be the French version. Check your local listings!

Yesterday Shawna and I had our very first music video shoot. Our friend Dale was directing one for a local band, and he asked us if we could be feature dancers. We said yes, of course, especially because Shawna said it was a metal band and 18-year-old me was WAY impressed. Shawna mentioned the shoot was out at Dale's place, and someone replied, "oh, the mansion?" and she laughed, thinking it was a joke.

Er, no. It wasn't.

I want this house.Collapse )

So. My work will be on TV in two VERY different forms. Heh.
Mama Fortuna
19 November 2011 @ 10:42 am
Winter has officially arrived. You wanna know how I know? I'll tell you!

I decided to start jogging again. So. It's Thursday night. My sibling unit graciously agrees to cook dinner so that I can go for a run. I decide to run to the Shopper's Drug Mart and back, because I need to buy hair dye and foam rollers. I put on my ghetto jogging clothes (tights, shorts, cotton long-sleeved shirt and a hoodie) grab my mp3 player, and venture outdoors! It's raining a little, but what the hell, I have a hood!

I get about ten steps away when I notice the raindrops are awfully big. And sort of... floating rapidly down.

Because it isn't rain.

It's SNOW.

Because I am determined/a stupid asshole, I went running anyway. Pity the Shoppers is uphill, and the snow was blowing directly in my face. I think by the time I got there, all sweaty and soaked through, I probably resembled one of the East Van crackies, and the cashiers probably thought I was going to try and steal cherry Robitussin to drink.

Today is is sunny and freezing fucking cold again. I know this because I walked to the bakery to buy delicious, delicious pastries and coffee to have before I clean the house.

Period Pieces. This is so epic.
Mama Fortuna
16 November 2011 @ 10:26 pm
Okay, here's what I'm gonna be submitting to the New World Witchery contest!

Cleansing ritual bath.Collapse )

Did this one the other night on my sister, actually.
Mama Fortuna
14 November 2011 @ 08:12 pm

I remember talking about this exact subject years ago (albeit less intelligently and with probably more swearing) when I noticed that the uber-gawth Vampire deck I owned would, without fail, recommend the harshest possible course of action for any problem. So, you know, if you wanted to curse someone it was the deck to ask.
Mama Fortuna
12 November 2011 @ 09:37 am
Attention, my magical peeps! (Which brings to mind an army of marshmallow chicks with wands, really.)

As I may have mentioned before, New World Witchery is having a contest! A SPELL contest! And the deadline was extended to November 18th!

I am encouraging each and every one of you to enter. I'm entering. That's all the proof you need to know that it's what the cool kids are doing.

Last night Shawna and I cleaned the house. This might sound weird, but in many ways I'm a bit of a housewife - I tend to do all of the cooking and cleaning in our house, so having Shawna home and helping was a really nice little change. Even cooler was that I got to do some actual spiritual and magical work with my little sis. Awwwz!

This of course reminded me that I still need to cut together our first podcast and see if it's fit for human listening. Following that, I need to really get more content on the blog we have together. I want to clean up my online presence in general, really - there are unused blogs and websites and whatnot cluttering up the universe with my name on em, and that's not necessary.

I finally bought a new scanner. This means I can, at long last, start updating art again. Which reminds me...

I saw Neil Gaiman and Amanda Palmer last weekend. The show ran super late, but I would not trade those hours for anything. It was a beautiful show, full of love and humour and creepiness, and I cried. I expected to cry at Neil (because Neil ALWAYS makes me cry) but his beautiful and hilarious wife reduces me to a blubbering baby multiple times. If you EVER have the chance to see them live together, take it. They said this tour would be made into video, so you can at least watch that if you missed them.
Mama Fortuna
10 November 2011 @ 09:56 pm
The Universe has a wicked sense of humour.

Don't despair.
Mama Fortuna
05 November 2011 @ 10:13 am
I am still cleaning up from Halloween. My goal today is to finish all of that - the biggest challenge is the sewing area and finding all the stuff I tucked away for the party last weekend.

Shawna, Michael and I went to Indian Oven over in Kits last night, so I didn't get home until eight thirty. Consequently I only got my bedroom cleaned, leaving everything else for today. Right now I'm ignoring it and sitting in bed with the laptop and a cup of tea. Literally everyone around me at home and work are sick as hell, and my body is valiantly fighting off I don't even KNOW how many illnesses.

My mom came in for Halloween proper, which was awesome. Also awesome was that we went with her to the book distributor. I bought three new books - one is a gift for a gentleman friend - and Shawna actually found one for herself.

I'm currently reading 'The Witch's Bag of Tricks' which is essentially a beyond-beginner book about magic and ecclectic pagan spirituality. Good points include the fact that it is geared towards ecclectics - the author directly states this - and plenty of exercises to try. There are some exercises that make me sort of snort and roll my eyes a bit, but that could be more me and my fear of looking intensely stupid than anything else. The author does seem to place a lot of weight on 'ESP' but I'm about halfway through the book now and I wonder if perhaps it's just the term that grates on me. I don't consider myself psychic, which I guess might be odd for a fucking foretune teller, so certain phrases really sort of bring out my inner Penn Jillette. (I love my inner Penn. He gives me words like 'cuntpickle.')

I also purchased 'The Woman Magician: Revisioning Western Metaphysics from a Woman's Perspective and Experience.' ...I think I can hear Pete laughing from across the ocean right now.But it looks fascinating! There have been women in occult societies despite the very best efforts to keep us out, and especially in Western Ceremonial there has GOT to be some interesting ideas about all the dick waving that goes on.

Shawna bought a book (the title escapes me) that gives rituals based on fairy tales. She says so far it's really good, and the author wrote a book on being male in female-centric spirituality that she thinks I'd like. (God I'm predictable.)

Now, my mom pointed me to another book. 'Celtic Lore & Spellcraft of the Dark Goddess - Invoking the Morrigan.' Now. If you just tuned in to this channel, or if somehow you never pieced it together... The Morrigan is my spiritual mother. I know, how goth. Hey, you have to remember I came of age in the 90s - if you were a chick, you basically watched 'The Craft' and went from there. And 'from there' meant lists of gods and goddesses and bad revisionist history and loads of Celtic knotwork. And if you were spooky, you gravitated straight to the death gods.

That's putting it very flippantly, but whatever, it's Saturday morning and I'm not gonna get all serious on your ass.

Anyway. The Morrigan is one of those deities who pops up in passing in several books that deal with Celtic Myth/Arthurian legend, but who generally gets a bit shafted in terms of actual information. You do a web search and you'll get a lot of pages with a black background and pictures of crows and ravens. If you're a nerd like me, you of course run out and get the Mabinogion and read up on Cú Chulainn and so on and that's about all that's available.

So an entire book on the Morrigan is an exciting prospect! ...but also scary because as I said, the 90s, and I remember how utter shit some of those books were. ('DJ Conway, anyone?)

At any rate, they were out of it at the distrubutors, but once it is in stock I am sooo buying it.

Llewellyn is publishing an awful lot of pagan fiction these days. Shawna said I should get in on that. But fuck NaNoWriMo - you crazy bastards can go nuts but I am so not prepared for that.
Mama Fortuna
31 October 2011 @ 10:29 am
Mama Fortuna
30 October 2011 @ 07:42 pm
Before I get ready to run out tonight...

The Skeleton Key - Halloween Blog.
Current Music: Cher - Dark Lady
Mama Fortuna
30 October 2011 @ 02:09 pm
Last night we had our annual cocktail party, and it went off beautifully. The food was stellar, the drinks were plentiful but not SO plentiful that anyone exceeded their limit, and more people came in costume than I was expecting. Shawna was Ginger from Gilligan's Island (if they never found the island) and I just put a small witch hat I made on and wore all black. I got pictures of Shawna but sadly my very pin-up-y costume wasn't captured on film.

Tonight we're going to Skank - Shawna is performing - and we're both doing costumes that involved sugar skull style makeup. Shawna's doing Marie Antoinette, so hers will have a bit of Prince Poppycock tossed in there too, and she has this huge and glorious light blue wig.

I'm going classic - my costume is La Santisima Muerte.

If you don't know who that is...

It's just Shawna and I at Skank tonight; although I expect to run into friends, we're going just the two of us. That's sort of nice, actually - it's like back when we were in our early 20s. I plan on doing a lot of sigil magic on the dancefloor. Again, just like in my 20s. XD

Be Sad Rather Than Scared This Weekend.
Mama Fortuna
27 October 2011 @ 05:47 pm
I know I haven't updated with as much spooky shit as I usually do this month - between AbraCadaver, the Taboo Revue, and work there really hasn't been as much time as I'd like. But rest assured I am still very much into the holiday spirit.

This manifested itself in my recent shopping trips. I bought more movies this past week than I have all year: Black Death; the Prophecy; I Spit On Your Grave; Demons; and just today from friggin London Drugs Night of the Demons which I am watching right this very second.

Why? This.

I'm so sad they remade that film. Sigh.

For your listening pleasure, I point you to the Witches BrewHaHa Halloween Special. Only downloadable until Halloween, it's hours of music and witchy tidbits. I totally recommend it.
Mama Fortuna
23 October 2011 @ 10:28 pm
We just had a bit of a hair crisis, here.

My sister is known for being a fake!ginger. She usually sports orange orange hair, which is the result of mixing two different orange punky dyes with pure orange pigment and applying it over bleach. As you may imagine, this is time consuming, even with her hair being shorter now. So she decided to go for a bit of a change and switch back to box dye. They don't seem to favour bright coppers anymore, so we picked a 'copper blonde' that showed on the back of the box something rather bright and close to what she used to use.


It went... brownish, with a hint of ginger. It was frankly ugly, and my dear and beloved sister wailed from the bathroom:


The story has a happy ending - her hair is now a rich Rita Hayworth-esque red. Since she's come from an unnatural hue, it's taken a few hours for her t get used to it but I'm confident that by tomorrow she'll love it. We may perk it up just a touch with some of the leftover vegetable punk orange, but it really is beautiful.
Tags: ,
Mama Fortuna
23 October 2011 @ 08:01 pm

After all my bitching... the Metrotown Lush had pumpkin soap.

So now I have pumpkin soap.

I'd say I'd thank the Great Pumpkin, but I fucking hate Charlie Brown. So I'll thank Satan, obvs.

Also: this. MY GOD THE PUG.
Mama Fortuna
22 October 2011 @ 09:48 pm
Sometimes, when you go out in public, every single person you see makes you want to stab them in the eye.

Today was one of those days, really. (Except for the nice girls at New World - they were lovely as always.)

The biggest let down was that, after being ignored in MAC (so I didn't get my Saddle eyeshadow, wtf) and walking on aching feet on an empty, growling stomach.... Lush was sold out of pumpkin soap. As were all the other locations. I scared the poor little salesboy who was dressed as Dracula by shouting 'MOTHERFUCKER!' upon receiving this news. (I did apologise, once I'd consoled myself with Glögg showergel.) I was just so sad because when I went into the store at the beginning of October, they didn't have any pumpkin soap yet and said it would not be in stock until later in the month. The company just made a small batch this year, we were informed, and it sold out two days ago.

Still. I had empty pots, so I got a free facemask, and it was nobody's fault really. ...Poor Dracula.

Shawna and I did some Halloween crafting this evening before she left for her boyfriend's house. We have a drink cart at the entrance to the kitchen, and I peeled off the tropical oilcloth on it and replaced it with some Autumn-y stuff instead. I also painted a Jar-O-Lantern. Shawna made a spooky wreath from coffee filters, which looks cooler than it sounds.

The house is looking more and more Halloweeny every day, and this pleases me. Expect some photos, and also some REALLY shitty video of us on the ghost train.

Happy Birthday, Shrunken Apple Head! I actually remember when this goddamn thing was first carved.